Tenderness is a quality that improves life the moment it is expressed. Realizing we have temporarily lost sight of a goal, for example, often prompts us to berate ourselves with hurtful phrases such as, “I never follow through; I’m such a loser; I can’t do anything.” How differently we feel when we respond to our perceived failures with tenderness: “Oh, where did that goal go? I wonder what got in the way of my plans to accomplish that? What wisdom is my body trying to share with me regarding what I need in this moment?” A tender attitude opens us to curiosity rather than judgment, and curiosity is the first step toward deepening our understanding of ourselves and others.
Sometimes the reason why we don’t accomplish what we’d like to is because we don’t acknowledge or even recognize our own dreams and goals. Our days are filled with meeting our responsibilities to others – at home and at work. Meeting others’ needs is satisfying and rewarding. However, by focusing exclusively on being conscientious with others, we can misplace the precious, secret things we dream of accomplishing ourselves.
Whether we like it or not, we live with uncertainty daily. On the world stage and in our neighbourhoods, our longing for security is challenged every moment. As we mature in experience and wisdom, we realize that we cannot know what is happening, even on the most intimate level, because our window onto the world is very tiny and the lens we peer through often distorts what we see. Happily, tapping can help to increase our tolerance for uncertainty.
Most of us living in the contemporary western world feel pressed for time. Time rules our family schedules, our work routines, our social calendars, and our personal relationships. Making time and losing time are regular daily themes, themes often marred by anxiety. To emphasize our relationship with time, I imagine readers are asking in this moment: Do I really have time to read this?